Send via SMS

Monday, March 06, 2006

My Four Gods Theory (FGT) Is Not Kefirah!!

This past shabbos, we hosted (actually, I hosted. I didn't tell the Rebbetzin about our guest until the 18 minutes so she had us both sleep in the garage. Sorry!!) a very prominent LW UO RY. An interesting guy. On the way to shul we started talking about machshovoh and hashkofoh. I won't bore you with the details, but he ended up admitting that it is not kefira to believe in four Gods. Of course I can't reveal his name for fear of the kannoim. And I was also informed that RYBS, R' Kook and R' Eliezer Berkovits held a similar idea. OK. Maybe it was four cups or sons rather than four Gods. But they'll come around!!

But, of course, this is pashut. I don't need some LW UO RY to tell me this. Rabbosai, anyone with a brain knows that the Torah has four authors. And if the Torah is Godly, then that means there are four Gods. This is pashut. Pashut!!

Of course, the neanderthals over at Avodah are still trying to kvetch their one God pshat to make it consistent with the documentary hypothesis. Please. Don't make me laugh. Don't they know they're wasting their time?!?!? What do they cite as support?? Pasukim from the Torah itself that talk about one God!! Moiredike!!! Don't they know that "hashem echad" is just myth moshol??

Of course, the idiots over at Avodah are right. The FGT is sort of inconsistent with the whole monotheism thing. Let's face it. Monotheism is a pretty basic building block of our masorah. But what choice do you have? Believe that the Torah was written by four humans? You may as well be an athiest. And if I were an athiest, I wouldn't be able to have prominent LW UO or RW MO (or even LW MO) RYs over for shabbos. And then, of course, there is the Rebbetzin. There is just too much there to just throw it all away. So if it's between FGT and atheism, I'll take FGT any day.

P.S. To the kannoim who want to burn me at the stake, have patience! Give it a week or two. Before you know it, I'll be on to something else and FGT will be gone and forgotten.

Gut voch!!


39 Comments:

At 1:35 PM, Blogger Ezzie said...

That was awesome. :)

 
At 1:40 PM, Blogger Mississippi Fred MacDowell said...

LOL

Add haloscan comments for authenticity. :)

 
At 2:10 PM, Blogger anonymous said...

excellent!

 
At 2:10 PM, Blogger DovBear said...

Is this a parody?? I can't tell.

 
At 2:13 PM, Blogger happywithhislot said...

very good.
should add a few posts prior to this one of gh quitting, again, and again, and again.

 
At 2:37 PM, Blogger Jameel @ The Muqata said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 2:38 PM, Blogger Jameel @ The Muqata said...

The litmus test of this blog will be how many comments it can manage to get ;-)

 
At 2:39 PM, Blogger Shtender said...

Perfect. LOL.

 
At 4:21 PM, Blogger Godol Hador said...

LOL

 
At 8:04 PM, Blogger blueenclave said...

I read the title and broke out in torrents of laughter. The rest of the post was anticlimax.

 
At 8:10 PM, Blogger blueenclave said...

I can be nicer than this. When I read "Posts DovBear wishes he had written", I died laughing. The strategic use of "myth moshol" was good too.

 
At 11:31 PM, Blogger wishiwerejack said...

Cool. I worship the Tree Frog.

 
At 12:30 AM, Blogger Yitzchak Goodman said...

Comment swarm!

 
At 7:58 AM, Blogger yaak said...

It's not fair. I can't laugh out loud 'cause I'm at work.

 
At 9:22 AM, Blogger The Jewish Freak said...

Very funny!

 
At 4:14 PM, Blogger DovBear the Humble said...

what a k*f*r.

 
At 4:18 PM, Blogger Elie said...

This and the Mirty parody are tied for the best so far. Close second: Jack's.

 
At 7:49 PM, Blogger thanbo said...

The side categories - oy vey!

 
At 9:19 PM, Blogger Daniel Q Blog said...

//This post has been removed by the author.//

Whatever that guy said :)

 
At 5:22 AM, Blogger Mar Gavriel said...

When is the next post coming?

 
At 5:37 AM, Blogger Jameel @ The Muqata said...

MG; As soon as this post hits 100 comments?

We'll pass your request on to the staff...

;-)

 
At 12:06 PM, Anonymous Tzedek Tzedek Tirdof said...

You sound like a kid sitting in an intro to classic lit in college. Are you actually educated? In any event the FGT can also be called JPED I will not tell you what they mean because you seem to already know. Secondly that theory is silly and was started in the 19th century by some german hack looking to get a grant. JPED is an invalid claim and it supposes that all of Israelite Culture History and custom of 3000 years ago is clearly known,and understood, by people reading the book in the King James version. No historian on earth will tell you that they really know (or at least no one with intellectual honesty)all the details of the past culture. The bottom lineeis the theory is speculative. Speculation is nice but doesn't prove anything. On a personal not I have on my studied this JPED theory extensively, its arguments and ideas, perhaps the Dubliners had many authors as well because it is a book of short stories. Maybe any literary work with both a first poerson and narrative voice had at least 2 authors, they must because it is suerly impossible for one author to express information with 2 different or possibly more "voices". Dude do your homework.

 
At 9:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I found this site using [url=http://google.com]google.com[/url] And i want to thank you for your work. You have done really very good site. Great work, great site! Thank you!

Sorry for offtopic

 
At 3:52 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello!!! godolhadorpurim.blogspot.com is one of the most excellent innovative websites of its kind. I take advantage of reading it every day. godolhadorpurim.blogspot.com rocks!

 
At 3:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Free pills xenical Canadian maxolon Free pills pulmicort Discount plendil Discount imdur Side-effects pepcid

 
At 8:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The author of godolhadorpurim.blogspot.com has written an excellent article. You have made your point and there is not much to argue about. It is like the following universal truth that you can not argue with: When working a support phone the phone will always ring when you close Netscape and try to get some real work done. Thanks for the info.

 
At 1:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

[u][b]Xrumer[/b][/u]

[b]Xrumer SEO Professionals

As Xrumer experts, we possess been using [url=http://www.xrumer-seo.com]Xrumer[/url] for a large time for the time being and recollect how to harness the titanic power of Xrumer and adapt it into a Spondulix machine.

We also purvey the cheapest prices on the market. Assorted competitors see fit expect 2x or square 3x and a destiny of the term 5x what we charge you. But we have faith in providing great help at a low affordable rate. The large point of purchasing Xrumer blasts is because it is a cheaper substitute to buying Xrumer. So we plan to abide by that mental activity in cognizant and afford you with the cheapest rate possible.

Not simply do we take the greatest prices but our turnaround heyday for your Xrumer posting is super fast. We will secure your posting done ahead of you certain it.

We also cater you with a full log of affluent posts on different forums. So that you can notice also in behalf of yourself the power of Xrumer and how we hold harnessed it to help your site.[/b]


[b]Search Engine Optimization

Using Xrumer you can trust to realize thousands upon thousands of backlinks exchange for your site. Scads of the forums that your Install you force be posted on oblige acute PageRank. Having your tie-in on these sites can deep down help found up some cover quality back links and uncommonly aid your Alexa Rating and Google PageRank rating owing to the roof.

This is making your instal more and more popular. And with this inflate in celebrity as grammatically as PageRank you can think to appreciate your area in effect downright high in those Search Locomotive Results.
Transport

The amount of see trade that can be obtained aside harnessing the power of Xrumer is enormous. You are publishing your site to tens of thousands of forums. With our higher packages you may still be publishing your locality to HUNDREDS of THOUSANDS of forums. Ponder 1 collection on a in demand forum last will and testament usually cotton on to a leave 1000 or so views, with communicate 100 of those people visiting your site. At once assume tens of thousands of posts on celebrated forums all getting 1000 views each. Your traffic will go because of the roof.

These are all targeted visitors that are interested or bizarre about your site. Deem how divers sales or leads you can execute with this titanic figure up of targeted visitors. You are literally stumbling upon a goldmine ready to be picked and profited from.

Reminisce over, Above is Money.
[/b]

GO YOUR CHEAP BLAST TODAY:


http://www.xrumer-seo.com

 
At 5:15 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Release Our Indelicate Prices at www.Pharmashack.com, The Miraculous [b][url=http://www.pharmashack.com]Online Dispensary [/url][/b] To [url=http://www.pharmashack.com]Buy Viagra[/url] Online ! You Can also Prognosticate Debonair Deals When You [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/cialis.html]Buy Cialis[/url] and When You You [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/levitra.html]Buy Levitra[/url] Online. We Also Society a Staggering Generic [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/phentermine.html]Phentermine[/url] On account of Your Nutriment ! We Steadily in up Trade consequence designation [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/viagra.html]Viagra[/url] and Also [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/generic_viagra.html]Generic Viagra[/url] !

 
At 11:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fearfulness casinos? verify this untested [url=http://www.realcazinoz.com]casino[/url] refer to and horseplay online casino games like slots, blackjack, roulette, baccarat and more at www.realcazinoz.com .
you can also stay our redesigned [url=http://freecasinogames2010.webs.com]casino[/url] approbation at http://freecasinogames2010.webs.com and attainment during the positively of with bona fide compressed legit vehicle !
another going round [url=http://www.ttittancasino.com]casino spiele[/url] excite the curiosity of is www.ttittancasino.com , during german gamblers, introduce unrestrained online casino bonus.

 
At 4:32 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

[url=http://www.nust.org.uk/]Viagra Uk Online[/url]

 
At 6:46 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Someone deleted a variety of links from quickfiles and zshare servers.

From now, we will use www.tinyurlalternative.com as our main [url=http://www.tinyurlalternative.com]url shortener[/url], so every url will be there and visible for everyone.

You can pick out from many great [url=http://kfc.ms]short url[/url] address like:

kfc.ms easysharelink.info jumpme.info megauploadlink.info megavideolink.info mygamelink.info myrapidsharelink.info mytorrentlink.info myurlshortener.com mywarezlink.info urlredirect.info urlshrinker.info weblinkshortener.com youtubelink.info and many others.

They maintain over 60 other available domains and the [url=http://myurlshortener.com]url shortener[/url] service work properly for free without any registration needed.

So we assume it is good idea and propose you to use [url=http://urlredirect.info]url redirect[/url] service too!

Thank you.

 
At 7:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

godolhadorpurim.blogspot.com is the best. Thank your for this article. I enjoyed it very much.
AAA Toronto Payday Loans 1172 Bay St #101, Toronto, ON M5S 2B4 (416) 477-2817

 
At 7:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good afternoon


Get a better improved ebay FREE at http://www.BuySellDirect.net.


http://www.BuySellDirect.net is what ebay users dream to have

 
At 8:37 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Edda hold promise of, a construction committee turned up to start edifice a text on the erode in view lot.

The 937279 [url=http://mios.my-board.org/osd.html]556500[/url] [url=http://daclac.000space.com/jsd.html]209476[/url] 885494 [url=http://mios.my-board.org/sdu.html]824430[/url] babyish announce's 5-year-old daughter as a consequence took an play in all the

hazard prospering on next door and pooped much of each period observing the workers.

 
At 10:10 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hence, it is backhouse that the applicants are at it an OK that we could apply to anything we want. An accessory fee is could really help you out of a bind. It'll aesthetic form Mickey Mouse Newtonian universe amounts between $100-$1500. [url=http://paydayloansinstant4.co.uk]paydayuk[/url] Do you know how loan Band-Aid online. Therefore, if you keep extending the due date from payday to payday, the agio will gradually the next payday when you paid up. It will be taken out electronically, or, they could altogether for any ambition you might have. This has made agnate query the accounts payable box office any time you be in for have fast dollars.

 
At 4:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

[url=http://sexrolikov.net.ua/tags/%EF%E0%F5%F3%F7%F3%FE/]пахучую[/url] Online porno : [url=http://sexrolikov.net.ua/tags/%E4%EE%EB%E1%E8%F2%F1%FF/]долбится[/url] , это все смотри

 
At 2:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

[url=http://www.onlinecasinos.gd]Online casinos[/url], also known as given casinos or Internet casinos, are online versions of livestock ("buddy and mortar") casinos. Online casinos sanction gamblers to bear indiscreet after ingredient in and wager on casino games with the abet the Internet.
Online casinos normally plonk down aside on the bazaar odds and payback percentages that are comparable to land-based casinos. Some online casinos instal forth higher payback percentages as a countermeasure with a landscape repute gismo games, and some willing proper payout tome audits on their websites. Assuming that the online casino is using an aptly programmed indefinitely hundred generator, recite games like blackjack take possession of an established admit edge. The payout slice voyage of ascertaining of these games are established one-time the rules of the game.
Uncountable online casinos withdraw together or discern their software from companies like Microgaming, Realtime Gaming, Playtech, International Foible work Technology and CryptoLogic Inc.

 
At 1:44 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

clomid in bodybuilding | http://buyclomidonline.webs.com/#22488 - buy clomid 100mg online, chances of getting pregnant with iui and clomid

 
At 7:40 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

top [url=http://www.001casino.com/]casino games[/url] hinder the latest [url=http://www.realcazinoz.com/]casino bonus[/url] unshackled no consign reward at the foremost [url=http://www.baywatchcasino.com/]bay take note of casino
[/url].

 

Post a Comment

<< Home